The following is offered as a guide to consider as you build a relationship.
Note: As soon as I say guide, every single reading this will think they are an exception and the timing noted does not apply to them. One of the strangest phenomenons that I have observed is that single dating behavior is more common than most of us think.
However, if you look at past (or current) flames using this method, you'll probably recognize when you moved in and out of these stages.
How long you stay in one stage depends on the couple.
I encourage you to not look for the ‘exception’ but where you can build the type of relationship that will serve you and your partner well for years to come.
Your brain cannot, biologically, maintain the high of infatuation; you will fry.I forgot how hot he is," or, "She is stunning," or "I love him so much."Resurfacing is a relationship resolution: "She is a mixed bag, but so am I," or "He sits on the toilet for an hour reading comics, but I pluck my chin hairs." You start thinking things like, "I can't wait for our next date," or, "I can't believe I have such a sweet person in my life who always has my back."A massive problem that you two resolved, a great date, an especially good night of sex, almost losing the other person, or good couples therapy can all trigger resurfacing.Anything can jolt us awake, a death in the family or even a birth.5. Do something that allows real life to take a break and the gentle, sweet intimacy to resurface, bringing us to the next stage.4.Resurfacing Resurfacing is the stage where you turn to your partner, and say to yourself, "Wow.But all those lovely feelings are that of a first swim in the cool, crisp pond of falling in love. Then the negotiation between security and autonomy, that life-long struggle, crawls in and we begin to land. Burying This stage happens when all the to-do lists of life come toppling into the relationship.along the lines of, "The day you wake up and say you have married the wrong person is the day that your marriage truly begins." It means that this is the day where the veil of infatuation lifts and the 20/20 vision of everyday living comes in."Wow, she is neurotic.""OMG, he tells the worst jokes.""I didn't think about him at all yesterday. Before you know it, conversations focus on things like who's doing the laundry, your boss, or the crazy mother-in-law.The media bombards us with sex and dating built appealing to our fantasies.There is a progression that should take place in building a relationship.They can be assured that they have taken the steps to assure a long and satisfying marriage.There are so many voices at play in our world today.